What Do You Think?

Posted: July 23, 2012 in Reflections, Thoughts
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,


What Do You Think?

What do I think?

Truly?

You really want to know?

I think that life is crap, that people are crap.

I think that I wish I could run away from 95% of the people in my life. That family and friendship and all that is a joke.

I think that having people on your wavelength is rare and valuable.

I think that sometimes I get very tired of people and then tired of life.

I think that there is never any point to telling people what I think. Or how I feel because any time that I have, my thoughts and feelings have always been misunderstood, invalidated or ignored. They have been taken offense to, and used against me.

I think it sucks that I was open and honest, at your request, and you became angered by how I felt and chastised me for it.

I think that tomorrow will be the same as yesterday, because my faith has given me duties that tie me to the source of my problems.

I think that tomorrow I will have to sit and smile my way through a 12 hour shift when I’d rather be under the covers just lost in the dream world.

I think that thinking is pointless.

I think that nothing changes.

I think that this is my test and I think that Allah will reward me for it.

I think that. I don’t know that. Hence it’s all one big cycle.

I think that I have had enough of blogging for today.

That is what I think.

 

-Z

Comments
  1. Julien says:

    It’s not always beautiful to see things as they are, sometimes you just have to focus on the good things in life, anything that bring a smile to your face and try really hard to ignore the bad or find a way to make it good. We all feel like crap sometimes but we have to always find a way to see the beautiful sides of life, they are plenty of them !

  2. Michele says:

    I know where you’re coming from and I feel the same most days. You express your feelings very well. I too spend my days around ungrateful selfish people who weigh heavy on my heart and invade my time and space.
    I care and I am interested in what you think because you care and because you see the world from an intelligent, caring and understanding perspective. Shame on those who make you feel worthless!!!

    • ”you express your feelings very well” -thank you for that! it is such a therapy to get how I’m feeling off my chest through writing. It is the main thing which keeps me sane (well sane-ish ;-p) It is awful that people can make others feel so, what gives them the right? How do you cope with it?

  3. notadamselindistress says:

    I love this post! I definitely feel like this sometimes. Great job, and keep up the good posts. :)

  4. Kymlee says:

    I just wrote this in the “rate the above users blog” thread but I’ll paste it here too…

    people ARE indeed crap. and I think a lot more people share your sentiments. I’ve been in this slump for like 2 yrs or more maybe feeling the same way and it’s really changed me. I CAN say that I’m finally starting to feel better because I needed the realization that people are always going to be crap but I can choose who I really want in my life. I can choose everything. I know it seems like there’s no end to the BS but there is, you just have to see the silver lining at some point, and it’ll happen in the right time for you. I think one of the most intense and oddly beautiful things in this world is that people are so shitty, but we still continue to live everyday, usually with our best foot forward, despite the muck. Keep plugging along!

    • I have to say Kym, the older I get the less I believe in people, and I hate that because I have a positive disposition but it is being diminished the more that I encounter man. I love your observation regarding how what tears us apart and causes such distress is also one of the amazing things about humans and our interaction. That despite that, we find love can heal and overcome it. That is amazing.

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